Counterfeit Girl Scout Cookies

Three months ago, I was a die hard Windows user, and when I mean die-hard, I mean, mother-fucking John McClane yippe-kai-yay-motherfucker die-hard windows user. So die-hard that if I even looked at a mac, I would get angry, and curse. Perhaps I would get so angry that a Nakatomi incident would happen.

Just a side note:
I'm not entirely sure why I got so angry, but I'm fairly sure it had to do with 3 years of expensive film school while being forced to edit on Macs; with their shitty speeds, constant crashing, and cumbersome illogical UI; while inside a hot computer lab with a bunch of pretentious fuck mouth breather film school students, each one of them wanting to be a no talent ass clown like Quentin Tarantino.

But I digress.This was a little over 2 years ago, before Apple made a few changes to there pathetic little Unix based OSX; and a free little indie application was released.

I recently got a good job, for a fortune 500 company. The only thing that bothered me that there design teams all used Macs. I hated working on macs, it was like someone sticking a fire hot needle into my dick and then repeating the process; several times over.
Now the changes certainly are not the 'dock'; as it is still a cumbersome piece of shit, and a sorry flashy rip off of the old NeXT manager that's about half as usable, and four times as annoying. Nope, not the dock. It's definitely not the limiting, sorry excuse for a windowed interface; with it's Nazi-esque, "I can only resize the window from the bottom right corner." No, not that. It's not the un-heuristically sound six-billion-year-old-birthed-at-the-dawn-of-time non-application fixed menu bar that causes the user to get lost in the interface and click on menus not even related to the assumed window at hand; No. They all still suck.

I'm talking about 2 little things that saved this operating system from eternal damnation in my eyes. I'm talking:

Exposé, (with some faggoty French accent over the "e" so all the Steve Jobs dick sucking, pretentious mac users can get and even bigger boner in their turtle neck sweaters while the auto-erotic-asphyxiate themselves to the latest U2 Album) is one of the few actual improvements to the UI. Now I can actually get around the shitty OSX interface in a comparable amount of time. (Oh and hey Jobs; Thanks for stealing Alt+Tab.)

And:

Quicksilver + Applescript/Automator. It's about time some responsible Mac programmers got a fucking brain and gave keyboard jockey's around OSX. Now I can actually do things without the fucking mouse, like on a legitimate !NIX/Windows Operating System. I mean, with out Quicksliver, I might actually have to waste 10 - 20 seconds of my life navigating to the "applications" folder to find what I need. Now that I've programed menial tasks such as "emptying the trash", and "batch resize" and "syncing folders" with Automator. I spend less time fucking with apples shitty interface and more time getting work done.

Oh, spotlight isn't all that bad either, At least I can find shit on a Mac now. Long story short, Mac's are bearable now, and I think Jobs and I are at an agreement on a few things...

... But the iPhone is still gay. Just thought I would say that.